My man has a low libido

Struggling Because My Husband Has A Low Sex Drive

low-sexdriveAfter some prayer and talking with my husband, we both agree that it may be beneficial to share our story. We are Robert and Meggan, we were married at 18 and 19 years old in 2003. This is our 10th year of marriage and we’re expecting baby number five!

5 1/5 years ago Robert started getting sick at the age of 22. 1 1/2 years later he was finally diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. His whole body was shutting down by the time they caught it. It was a 3 year recovery, but the one thing that never returned was his sex drive. There were times where we went 6 weeks without being intimate. This broke my heart and many nights I cried myself to sleep.

How do I handle marriage when my husband has a low sex drive? How have we gotten through this?

We had lots of fights over our struggle with intimacy, until I realized the change needed to be made in me. Lately, I’ve caught myself praying:

Lord take away this selfishness and give me understanding.

The realization that Robert can’t change helped me change my attitude. Do I still get upset? Yes, but not often and that prayer helps.

mooreThere is hope.

When he got sick I felt like I was slowly watching my husband die and wondered all through that year and a half if he would leave me a widow with 3 young children. There were times during the worse part of his illness that we would go six weeks without being sexually intimate and even then I felt like I had to beg for it. After his diagnoses he faced his worse nightmare (a life of needles) and depression hit. He may have started getting better physically, but he started questioning his faith in God, which in return affected our intimacy. So I was even more heart broken because now it wasn’t just physical, it was mental and spiritual as well. The Antidepressants made his libido even worse.

So when did it change you ask?

When somehow I ended up pregnant with number baby number four. Everything blew up! I told him that I never feel love from him at all anymore and I was questioning if he even did. I told him that I would never divorce him, there was too much of my love invested for me to just give up. He decided he wanted to fight too.

We took a little break and he went to visit his family. At this point intimacy wasn’t even a part of our marriage. I had no idea where his standing was with our Heavenly Father, who had been the center of our marriage and this to me was the most important. But anyone who has to ask for a kiss would have a broken heart like mine.

Good, thanks for this part 1

by Fingleheimer